Two years later and still suffering

It's been two years and I am still suffering from this crap. I am back on my meds. This time I have added Ativan to the mix. It's for those "just in case I am going to blow" moments. All I know is I can't keep livin life like this. I need help. And if this is what I need the so be it. I hate it but I know I will feel better in the end. Today I took an Ativan and felt better. Didn't put me to sleep like I thought it would. I am looking forward to living a productive life again. I guess only time will tell.